Enliven Technique with Basic Goodness

I wrote the following article sometime in 2013, but the message strongly relates to the podcast episode that aired recently (click here to listen) and prepares our thoughts for future podcast episodes. So I dusted this article off and offer it again as a piece of writing with an important idea and philosophy that is worthy of our attention. Again and often.
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"It simply makes no difference how good the rhetoric is or even how good the intentions are; if there is little or no trust, there is no foundation for permanent success. Only basic goodness gives life to technique." -- Dr. Stephen R. Covey (American educator and author, 1932-2012)

Dr. Stephen Covey wrote this in his 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (affiliate link) (Kindle version). Recall what Dr Suzuki wrote about music and character: "Beautiful tone, beautiful heart." Written in the Preface to Suzuki Violin Volume Two, Dr. Suzuki writes that "strings only sing the heart of the one who plays them. . . . because our entire personalities are revealed in the tone we produce."

"In human terms, if one lives in a self-centered, egotistical and immature way, one's life will be that of no joy and constant dissatisfaction. In other words, because of selfish needs, what one creates will be nothing but noise.

In contrast, when one lives by the principle of serving the hearts of others and learns to live for other people, one can enjoy a life of light, without discord, in harmony with others, and walk through life in pure joy. Similarly, the ultimate goal of music education, as well as the secret of violin playing is to guide others away from the world of self-centeredness to that of loving hearts in the service of others.

. . . The philosophy of violin playing is the same as that for life. Man, like the violin, can only sing the song of his own heart." -- Shinichi Suzuki (1898-1998, Japanese violinist, educator, and founder of Suzuki Method of Talent Education)

It was Dr. Covey's words about basic goodness giving life to technique that spurred my memory of Dr. Suzuki's words about the violin singing the song of the human heart. I believe that both men would agree with each other. What we are inside is revealed when we play the violin, or whenever we play music.

I teach a string techniques course at the university, in which I teach music education students how to teach string techniques. I can work a few minutes with one of the university students and tell you much about that student just by how the student approaches the instrument, by the type of sound that the student produces, and by the type and amount of energy level that the student produces while playing. I am sure that the students think I am some sort of gypsy fortune teller because I am able to accurately describe the student's personality style within minutes of teaching the student. I can guess at the types of hobbies the student might pursue, the state of the student's clothes closet at home, and what sort of social life the student maintains. I can accurately guess what types of grades a student usually gets in classes and how uptight the student is.

When I listen to student recitals, I can close my eyes and envision the sort of person that is playing. I can hear whether the person is smiling inside or hurting. I can feel the student's instrument and music vibrating in the air, and I can tell whether the student is trying to communicate with me on some level or whether the student is playing "at me" or for their own inward purposes.

I know of several teachers who routinely assign special homework to their students during the week, which consists of character building exercises along the lines of doing things for others. The idea here is that if the students frequently perform acts of goodness or kindness, then the students will get into the habit of doing good or being kind. I think this is a great idea because it makes students and parents aware of the exercise. Hopefully, when one person sees another doing such good things, the person will admire the effort and will strive to imitate the gesture. The one act could exponentially grow to include many, many others.

What such an exercise will also do is help to purify and mature the heart and spirit of the person doing the exercise. We all know that "going through the motions" will not make a person good overall, but doing so will go a long way toward building such a person in the end. We have heard the adage "fake it until you make it," and this catch-phrase may say it all. We may have to go through the motions and build the character habit until we finally reach the point that the motions and the good strong character are instilled in us. I believe that good character is just another ability that we can develop by over learning.

What Drs. Covey and Suzuki are both telling us here is that good character is the foundation to good in everything else. For Dr. Covey, good character provides the structural framework for good attitude, good relationships, good communication, and good leadership. For Dr. Suzuki, good character will be reflected in a person's music, which is the performer's personal expression of inward emotion, attitude, and sense of beauty. Without good character, something is "off" about the person, and no amount of technique will change that. We will be dazzled by technique, but we will not be moved by it. We might admire someone for their technical skill, but we will not be persuaded to move mountains.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. -- Aristotle*

This week, let us contemplate the words of both Dr. Covey and Dr. Suzuki and consider what habit of character we build through our repeated actions. Let us strive for excellence. More than that, let us make the effort to repeatedly do the right things that will strengthen our character. Let us reach out to the world and build connections that will uplift and encourage our society and world to grow beyond itself in a good way, in the right way.

Go forth and do good!

Happy Practicing!

----- Paula -----

© 2017 by Paula E. Bird

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*Although this quote is attributed to Aristotle, it may actually come from Will Durant and his work "The Story of Philosophy," in which Durant summed up Aristotle's thoughts.

Watch Your Language

"I can't do it!"

"I'm so stupid!"

"I'll never be able to get this!"

"I'm just not very good at this."

When I trained for the marathon in 2005-6, I learned that it was imperative that I keep my mind in a positive mode. I found it easier to stay the course in my training and discipline if I kept my mind in a healthier, more upbeat place, because whenever any negativity entered into my sphere, I noticed that it had a detrimental effect on my psychological ability to push through and keep going.

During my training, I picked up many helpful tricks to stay in this happier mental state, and I found these tricks quite useful in the musical arena as well. Most of these simple tricks related to a simple tweak in my focus and awareness of the language I chose to use aloud and to myself.

"You can do this, you know you can."

Yes!

"You're a person who perseveres when things get tough."

"You have the discipline and strength to finish this."

"You are prepared for this, so relax and let the training take over."

I said these affirmations, especially the first one, frequently every day. What I discovered is that the affirmation would pop into my head several times all on its own. It became a part of my self-talk on a regular basis, and I noticed that my attitude stayed positive and strong as a result.

But how do we get to this stage? For some of us, our self-talk has dipped so low, that we are unaware of how weighty it has become. It pulls on us, gnaws on us, and ultimately drags us down to an unpleasant place where things seem so hard and impossible to accomplish. How do we fix this negative self-talk habit? I have a few suggestions.

Here are three easy steps that you can take to help you notice and change your language choices.

Change your Physical State

Changing our physical state will often change our mental state. For example, when I am angry or frustrated, I notice that my shoulders, upper back, and back of the neck are tense. I hold my breath. When I adjust these tension points and take a slow breath out and then in, my mental attitude responds as it relaxes and drifts toward a more positive state.

Notice what your physical state is the next time you catch yourself saying something negative. Are you holding your breath? Are you squeezing a muscle somewhere in your body? Are you clenching anything? Are you smiling? Whatever you are doing, change it to something else. I find that smiling is the fastest way to change a negative physical condition. I make it a practice to smile at the top or bottom of every flight of stairs at work, from the initial stairway that leads down to the front door of my workplace to the inner staircase that connects both floors of the building. Every time I reach the bottom or top of the staircases, I remind myself to smile. This is a habit that I have built over time, and I think that it has helped immensely to alter my face into a happier one when I greet my colleagues and students within my workplace.

But it Doesn't Matter

This suggestion comes from one of my favorite books. Although this book is devoted to marathon training for non-marathon runners, I find that much of the book has some very useful tips for musicians. The book, Non-Runner's Marathon Trainer by David Whitsett, Forrest Dolgener, and Tanjala Kole, has three parts to each chapter:

• The first part is devoted to the psychological or mental aspect of training and preparing for a marathon.
• The second part advises things related to the physical aspects of training.
• The third part recounts personal stories and advice from runners involved in the training program.

What I found most helpful in this book from a musician's standpoint was the psychological discussion at the beginning of each chapter. When it comes to altering your language choices or focus, I highly recommend this book as one of the tools you might use because of its wealth of information contained at the beginning of each chapter. And the training program (4 runs per week) is pretty darn good too.

One very useful suggestion from the marathon training book was the phrase, "but it doesn't matter" placed at the end of every complaint or negative thought. For example, I might start whining because I am having trouble with my coffee pot. "But it doesn't matter!" I will exclaim. Then I will argue with myself for a few more sentences: "yes it matters! I need to have my coffee in the morning without fussing with the coffee pot!" I pause and remember what I am supposed to do. "But it doesn't matter," I will remind myself to say aloud.

It really does not matter unless you believe it does, and by reminding yourself that it does not matter, you will remind yourself to overcome whatever frustration is in this moment. Since we routinely overcome many such problems in our lives, this teensy reminder goes a long way to refocus our attitude, belief, and view of ourselves -- that we can do this. After reminding myself a few times that my complaints really do not matter, I will notice that my body completely relaxes with the change in thought and attitude.

Modify Your Behavior (the Positive-Negative Marble Jars)

One studio family came up with a clever idea to help modify their child's language behavior. The daughter was in the habit of arguing a lot without really meaning to argue. She would enter into conversations with a conflicting viewpoint, or she would answer "yes" and then follow it up with "but" or "no." Her parents came up with a behavior modification scheme to help the daughter to recognize when she was doing these types of behaviors, and the parents helped her to find a concrete way to record these negative or positive behaviors. The parents hoped that by recording the language choices the daughter made, that the daughter would then refrain from the unwanted negative language in favor of positive responses. Instead of saying, "no," "but," an excuse of any kind, or any other negative words, the parents encouraged her to say, "yes, and," "okay," and "may I" instead. For example, here is a possible conversation before the behavior modification scheme:

Parent: "I think it's going to be a nice day."
Child: "Yes, but it's going to rain later."

Teacher: "I think your left hand could be more relaxed so that your wrist is flatter rather than bent."
Student: "But I'm holding it relaxed!"

Parent: "Can you take out the garbage later?"
Child: "No."

If you notice, there would not be much to say after those brief exchanges. After the behavior modification, the above conversations might go like this:

Parent: "I think it's going to be a nice day."
Child: "Yes, and it might rain later too."
Parent: "Oh that might complicate things! We do need the rain for the garden though."

Teacher: "I think your left hand could be more relaxed so that your wrist is flatter rather than bent."
Student: "Okay, let me try that. Does this work better?"
Teacher: "Yes, that's better. Can we work together to see if your wrist can relax even more?"

Parent: "Can you take out the garbage later?"
Child: "May I do it after dinner rather than right now?"
Parent: "Of course, that would be a terrific help!"

Notice that it feels more comfortable to continue with the conversation when there are positive responses.

Here is a picture of the positive-negative jars that the parents used to help their daughter become more aware of the language choices she made. If the daughter said something negative or positive, then she would put a marble in the appropriate jar. Notice how many positive marbles there are after only a few days of this exercise! At the next lesson, the daughter was very eager to tell me the exact number of positive versus negative marbles that she had in her jars.

Positive and Negative Marble Jars

One of my other posts discussed what a performer might say after a recital or other performance. If you would like to read that post, click here.

If you are interested in the marathon book, click here. Please note that this is an affiliate link, meaning that it will be no additional cost to you and you are under no obligation to purchase this item, but if you are already in the market to buy this book, I will get a financial benefit that will go to support the blog and the production of the podcast. I appreciate your help so that I can avoid putting advertisements on the blog.

As a reminder too, if you have not yet subscribed to my newsletter, please do so or send me an email and I will add you to the mailing list. At the moment I send the newsletter out twice a month and include links to articles and podcast episodes that you may have missed. As always, I greatly appreciate my readers and all of their helpful suggestions and comments!

Happy Practicing!

----- Paula -----

© 2016 by Paula E. Bird

Gratitude

Here is a tradition I started last year and plan to continue annually at our spring recital. I write a thank you note for each of my students. They are not lengthy notes -- perhaps one or two sentences long. The act of thinking and writing these notes helps me focus my attitude on the things that I find special about each student and our relationship.

For my youngest students, I might draw a note in picture language and include a few stickers:

For other students I might include a little card with one or two quotes that can be hung up in the child's bedroom or placed inside the instrument case, which is where many of my students kept them this past year. 

This "thank you" task may take a few minutes of my time, but I like the way I feel about my students, their parents, my studio, and the past teaching year after I have finished.

Thanks! Until next time,

Happy Practicing!

----- Paula -----

© 2016 by Paula E. Bird

Reflections and Podcasts

Dear Readers (and Listeners, I hope),

I am on a mission! This is a truly wonderful mission, and I hope that I can convince you to join me. I want to do something that will change the world for our children, and then in turn, will change their world for future generations of children.

I want us to turn our focus to our children. I want to focus our thoughts, our behavior, and our attitudes toward those thoughts, behavior, and attitudes that will affect powerfully and positively our children and the world that they live in. I know we are all busy. Life just has a nasty habit of getting in our way. Just when I think I have finally mastered that scheduling issue I always seem to have, I bump up against another project that wants my attention or that gets in my way.

If you are like me, you are weary at times with working as hard as you do. Parenting is a 24 hour, 7 day a week job. Teaching feels like at times too. Parenting probably feels worse though because teaching is also part of parenting.

Okay, enough grousing about reality. I believe that we should deal with what is before us. For that reason, I have created two tools that I offer to parents and teachers and that I hope will brighten our days and perhaps lighten our hearts a little bit as we live out our daily lives. I certainly hope that that these tools will help to lift up our children's spirits and to sweeten their lives with more love and encouragement.

Both tools can be found on my website: http://teachsuzuki.com. I have written and produced two different series of podcasts:

The podcast "Reflections" is a series of short, minutes long episodes about a quote or other thought from Dr. Shinichi Suzuki's philosophy or writing. The purpose of these reflections is to give parents and teachers a chance to spend a few minutes thinking about how great the impact might be on the world and our children with merely a slight moment of reflection about a behavior, thought, or attitude.

Teach Suzuki Podcast is a series of longer episodes of about 20-30 minutes in length. These episodes focus in much more depth on a particular aspect of the Suzuki philosophy or Suzuki Method.

Both the Reflections and Teach Suzuki Podcast are designed to partner with parents and teachers both. It is my desire that we all remember daily how important our roles are to impact and affect the lives of others and especially the lives of the children in our world.

Please consider listening to both series of podcasts. If you like what you hear, please consider subscribing to iTunes. As always, I would appreciate suggestions, comments, and feedback. I want my mission to succeed!

Sincerely,

Paula E. Bird

Blogcast Episode Episode 4: Do You Like Your Child?

"A real meaning of sophistication is to be sensitive to another person's feelings, and have respect for their point of view." -- Dr. Shinichi Suzuki, Ability Development From Age Zero

I recorded this blogcast episode after reading the above statement. Not only do I need to spend more time reflecting on this statement, but I would like to encourage parents and other teachers to think about this message.

Episode 4: Do You Like Your Child?

Studio Focus: Environment

Last month we focused on posture. This month I would like to focus on environment. All kinds of environment.

I like the story that Dr. Suzuki tells about his foster son, Koji Toyoda, who is now the head of the Suzuki world-wide organization after Dr. Suzuki's death in 1998. When Dr. Suzuki brought young Koji into the home after the war when Koji was a young child, Koji had some bad manners and habits. Dr. Suzuki’s family complained about this, and Dr. Suzuki called a family meeting to talk about how the family could refrain from scolding and complaining and instead focus on improving the family’s own behaviors as role models and examples. The family turned its attention to its own individual contributions to the family environment, and the atmosphere changed as a result. Relationships in the home became more pleasant and agreeable. The negative focus on Koji turned aside in favor of a positive focus on behaving well and pleasantly as a family. And young Koji responded himself in a positive way as a result.

It is easy for us to focus on things that we do not like, and, as a result of this negative focus, we find it easy to continue to make a litany of complaints, because the adage is true that we get what we look for. If we are looking for negative, then we will find negative. However, if we can teach ourselves how to look for positive rather than negative, we might be able to turn the environment in a different direction. Certainly we will build a more positive experience.

So this month let us think about placing an emphasis or turning our focus to building a more positive home and studio practice, teaching, and learning experience for everyone. Let us start by acknowledging how much we treasure each other and our relationships with each other. We can do this by making a list of all the parties involved in our teaching and learning relationship and thinking of ways to show our appreciation. Is it a short note of thanks, a little card that says we are thinking of each other, a small gift, a hug, a few choice words of love? What can we do this week to express how much we care about each other?

I hope you will comment below about your plans and ideas to put this focus into practice in the coming week.

Happy Practicing!

----- Paula -----

© 2016 by Paula E. Bird